Grandpa Clawson

Niki asked me for some good pictures of George as a young man for her new baby boy's wall. While I've got them out, I thought I'd share what I found with the rest of you who might like to see. Enjoy his lovable face!

Four Corners

I spent most of Labor Day weekend with my best friend Kelley in southern Colorado. The rest of our time was spent here and there- a little in Utah, a little in New Mexico, and a little in Arizona at the Four Corners Monument.

The monument is in Navajo Nation territory and marks the only place in the US where four states share a quadripoint. It's pretty fun to stand on a spot and be in four different states at once.

I had to wait and wait to get this shot of the spot without anyone sitting or standing on the center for pictures. 

This is the seal in the center of the monument, kept shiny by all the bums that sit on it day after day.

Around the center are the four seals of each state.

Surrounding the four corners point are booths where the Navajo people sell interesting hand-made pots, dream-catchers, jade jewelry, knives made of buffalo ribs and the like. Three sides of the monument were FULL of vendors, Utah's side was totally empty. We WERE there on a Sunday, and NOBODY is open in Utah on the Sabbath!

There is a blurb about each state which made for interesting reading on the day, but right now, its a little boring. If you're interested in how each boundary came to be, you'll have to do your own reading. Yay for Wikipedia! Either that or go visit yourself. I don't want to tell you EVERYTHING.

Okay, it is actually pretty interesting. Who were these men, and how did they get their jobs? Why did they accept? What was it like to trek across such empty wilderness?

Here is a view from the monument of the vasty nothingness that is the desert. A place where a person could so easily get completely lost. 

Thank goodness today we have GPS technology so you always know where to go!

And yes, I pooped at the four corners. I think I was in Arizona.

I wish I could do that...

Source: artfulevidence.blogspot.com via Dwynne on Pinterest

I think this is nicely done watercolor project. I have always liked water colors, and always knew there were better ways to used them than I knew how, and much better ways, meaning modern, than to use them for old ideas like these:

Last time I tried to paint was a couple weeks ago, but I got frustrated with my lack of skills and put them away again. I did try tutorials on Youtube, etc. but everyone seemed to only teach how to paint "happy little trees," simple flowers, mountains, water.


Anna once told me that if I looked all over the internet and collected other people's ideas, pretty soon I'd start getting my own ideas. So I shall. After all, the bug to paint will eventually bite me again.

VALIDATION

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/03/spiders-are-scary-its-okay-to-be-afraid.html

My 2nd 30th Birthday

Life usually allots us only one thirtieth birthday, but I stubbornly insisted on having a second one. My first one doesn't count. It stunk. My plans to go up Provo Canyon to see the fall foliage, bbq, etc. flopped when my companions fell ill and cancelled.  I spent the day entirely alone. (This is sad.)  I still went up the canyon, by myself, and drove down to IKEA, by myself, ate there, alone, and selected curtains for my room without the benefit of a second opinion. Here they are:

I think I chose well, for I still like them, and they are a great improvement over the bedsheet I had hanging there for the first couple of months I lived in this room.  Notice, though, the disgusting color of the walls. I have hated it from the beginning. The "accent wall" has GOLD faux paint. Poorly done, I might add, and I've been living with it for too long. So, the problem: what color, out of all the colors out there, would I choose to paint my walls?

I spent months deliberating over these swatches... alone in my room staring at the walls. I finally selected "Serene Plum Grey" and went to Walmart to buy it and left with a gallon of "Dew of Silverberry" instead- I fell in love with it on the spot. Thus the fun begins!

Friday, the day before my second 30th birthday, my new fabulous friend Crystal and her husband Eric came to spend the night and to help me PAINT!!!!

Well, Crystal helped me paint, but Eric pooped out. He fell asleep on my bed while Crystal and I painted into the wee hours... and then we got a little half-hearted about it.

Pictures of the finished project will have to wait... I still have a lot of painting to do.

The next morning was my Re-do 30th Birthday at space camp!

Top Row, left to right: Andre, Dwynne, Heather, Michael, "Weevs," Trent, Natalie, Carlyn
Second Row: James, Megan, Eric, Crystal

Andre and Michael are old friends from CA, Crystal and Weevs also work at Infogenix, I know Carlyn, James and Megan from Minecraft, Natalie and Trent through Crystal, and Heather is Michael's date. A fun group. Everybody totally got into their roles.

Weevs was our Commanding Officer, the Admiral. James was our Captain, the second in Command. Crystal was third as the Exec, then Michael as Security, Megan as his Deputy, then Heather as Surveillance, then ME as Chief of Operations.

We were aboard the Deep Space Station, Magellan, an old Cardassian space station that was captured by the Federation during the war:

At one point during the mission, I found myself commanding on the bridge. Does that tell you how many people died?? A LOT. Then the ship blew up. The crew was supposed to go find a bomb that pirates had planted in the Briefing Room, then take it to the transport pad on Deck 2 so that I could beam it off the ship, but they all kept getting shot before they could find the bomb! We had to do this about three times before they finally got it to the pad and I finally got it beamed into space- and by then, I was alone in the bridge until the others "revived" and came back to join me. There were two objectives, the first was to rescue slaves out of Klingon space and the second was to make it there and back into Federation Territory in one piece. After blowing up three times, we eventually made the jump into hyperspace back to Earth and our time ran out. (2.5 hours in the simulator- not long enough!) We kind of made our objectives.

Michael at his Security Station before the mission began. I wish I had a picture of him gripping his Phaser Rifle- he never let go of it once we discovered pirates aboard. I don't think he shot anyone.

Andre up at Strategic Operations- he requisitioned parts from me all through the mission to build us a cloaking device. I don't think he got to finish it, though. He died a couple times too often.

It's super dark, but here is the crew on the bridge. (I need a real camera!)

We had gigglefits of fun! You can read more about the DSS Magellan here, and about the crew positions here, if you're interested... meaning, if you're as nerdy as me. I have found a new favorite thing to do!

It was a good 30th Birthday Re-do Party.  My twenties are complete. I can move forward now.

Move Recommendation- Troubled Water

I experienced such a range of emotions while watching Troubled Water! It's a tense drama, and beautiful. The main character plays the organ- the King of Instruments- and the arrangements of familiar songs transported me. Especially Simon & Garfunkel's Bridge Over Troubled Water, which is one of the first songs I taught myself to play on the piano. But, back to the film. While seemingly disjointed at first, the threads of the story are artistically woven together for a very satisfying conclusion.

Source: netflix.com via Dwynne on Pinterest

Movie Recommendation - Vera Drake

Vera Drake is a film I've been watching over and over in the last couple of months. Imelda Staunton carries the entire film on her shoulders and I can't help but stare at her flawless acting. From her facial expressions to her body language, she is Vera Drake. The story is intelligently told and very sweet. 5/5 stars.

Source: netflix.com via Dwynne on Pinterest

Fun Times

Being Aunt Dwynnie is the joy of my heart.

Zuki always asks if I want to play with her in her room. I don't think the games we play are what she expects.  ... but always fun!!

Malaika working her way around on all fours.

Zuki's Birthday Cake with Rapunzel and Eugene! Zukiswa is FOUR years old!

Taking notes during Conference. No, seriously. Conference is on.

We didn't pay attention the WHOLE time, though! Isn't Malaika's new toothy grin adorable?

A few weeks ago Elder Taylor Richardson came home from his mission in Brazil. Lots of family showed up at his welcome home party at Aunt Sally's house.

Counsin Jay Clawson and his wife, Auburn with their two little ones.

Cousin Lacy and Aunt Connie

Cousins Dante and Simona

Aunt Sally and Natalie

Cousins Jake and his return missionary brother, Taylor

Grandma Margene Clawson!

And of course, there are plenty of exciting things going on at home, too.

Roommate Jackie plunging the garbage disposal. ...I had my doubts, but it totally worked.

Gallbladder Removal - Too Much Information

January 2012 has a distinct story: I had surgery to remove my gallbladder. I'll never be the same again.

Warning: this post is gross. Parental Guidance is suggested. 

Time line of events:

January 15, Sunday: I get really sick and go into rapid care. They do blood tests and find an elevated white blood cell count. Abdominal exam painful. Gallstones suspected.

January 16, Monday: Call in sick. I go in for an ultrasound. Gallstones found.

January 18, Wednesday: I go in for a consultation with Dr. Gil, a surgeon. Abdominal exam so painful I cried. And cried.  He said he wanted to perform surgery ASAP, so he makes me wait two days.

January 20, Friday: Dr. Gil removes my very diseased gallbladder.

January 20-29: Owie ow ow owie ow ow ow. more crying. more owie.

January 30, Monday, I return to work, but leave early. I continue to go into work but haven't done a full day yet. I feel sore, sick to my stomach, tired, and my incisions have begun to sting and itch.

The details:

January 15, Sunday: I got up feeling fine. I ate yogurt and munched on grape tomatoes on my way to church. Upon parking, I felt a little strange, but told myself to suck it up- I was NOT skipping church. By the end of Sacrament Meeting, though, I was distinctly sick to my stomach. I returned home, where the barfing began. (The first episode was actually self-induced. My Dad says it's better to puke and feel better that sit around being sick enough to puke. So I puked. It didn't help.) By early afternoon, I was in real pain, so I did what any one would do: I called my mommy. She sympathized while I cried, and suggested that I find a rapid care to go to. She was on her way to church, where Dad already was, and said she'd have him call me. I decided that I'd wait to talk to him about it, and got on my knees to confirm that decision. Heavenly Father made me feel that I'd better get ready to go to the rapid care, so I began to get dressed and gather insurance info, and decided I should just go. I found a rapid care down the street and after letting Mom know, I took myself in. The doctor who saw me drew blood and did an abdominal exam- the only thing I could tell him at that point was that everything he did hurt. Not in a specific location though, so he gave me some white gunk to swallow that would numb my esophagus and stomach to see if that lessened the pain. It didn't, so he said he'd wait on the blood test results, but he did give me prescriptions for nausea and pain, which I took to a drive-through pharmacy to fill so I wouldn't have to move. While I waited, in the car, Dad called and we prayed together. I was comforted. I also called my bishop to let him know what was going on. When I got home, my very sweet RS president called and said she had a couple of guys on their way over to give me a blessing. They were so earnest! Taking my hand in the gentlest of manners to shake it and let me know to call if I needed anything. I love YSA priesthood holders. They are so CUTE about it!!  Anyway... the doctor called later to tell me that my white blood cell count was high, which told him there was an infection somewhere. He wanted me to go for an ultrasound the next day, I might have gallstones. 

January 16, Monday; Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, My little sister, Natalie, came to drive me in for an ultrasound. Her husband, Mo, had the holiday off, so he was able to stay with the girls. A tender mercy for me!! Together, Natalie and I wandered around Orem for a bit until we found the office where I was directed to. We went to check in, but found that this particular office did NOT accept my insurance, so they sent us to the Timpanogos hospital. I'd been fasting, as directed, so that my gallbladder wouldn't be contracted for the ultra sound and was very lucky that they had a slot open for me only a couple hours later. I was miserable. The nausea medicine was doing it's job, but I was still in pain and my mouth was incredibly dry. Dry, dry, dry. Yuck. They finally brought us into the ultrasound room. Nat sat by the bed rubbing my arm while the tech began her work and I stared up at pregnancy comics that were taped to the ceiling. I tried to puzzle them out, but I gave up on them after a while. Maybe they'll be funny when I'm pregnant.  Eventually, after making my turn on my side and hold my breath from time to time, the tech did find gallstones. I wiped the goo off myself and Natalie took me home. I relieved my dry mouth with SO much water I'm surprised I didn't throw it up. I ate a few crackers and went to bed.

January 17, Tuesday: don't remember much of this day. I took the prescribed pain killers which effectively knocked me out. Someone called and set me up with a consultation at Timpanogos Hospital with Dr. Gil, a surgeon. I called my insurance company to ask for details, and found that they cover accidents ONLY. None of these visits, consultations, exams, or the surgery itself, is insured. I'm going to be in the hole for a long time.

January 18, Wednesday: Why are hospitals such confusing places? It took me forever to find Dr. Gil's office, and I was exhausted by the time I finally found it. I filled out paperwork and waited and waited and waited, wondering where I would throw up if I had to. Misery. Finally, they brought me into an exam room, where a resident personage who was shadowing Dr. Gil did another abdominal exam. This time, the pain was definitely in the upper right side, and I lay there with tears rolling down my cheeks into my ears while she examined me. The tears didn't stop all through her explanation of what surgery would entail, they just kept a-rolling.  It really hurt.  Then Dr. Gil came in and quickly did another abdominal exam to feel for himself.  CRUEL pain!!  They left me alone for a while, making some arrangements, then Dr. Gil came back in and said that since I was in so much pain, he was going to treat the situation like an emergency and get me in for surgery on Friday. ACK! What kind of emergency is that!!? But, he was gentle and kept his hand on my shoulder, while he explained what was to happen, which was enough to make me feel safe in his hands. Sometimes a kind human touch means quite a bit: there was no trepidation. Since I was a self-pay patient, I was directed to another office in  Provo, where I had to pay half the surgeon's fee before they would schedule me for surgery. I headed down there and paid $600. They said someone would call me by the end of Thursday to tell me when my surgery would be. I went home and called my close friend, Kelley, whom I lived with in Denver, to tell her what was happening. She'd have been furious with me if I didn't let her know. She insisted on coming to be here with me. She practically booked her flight to Provo from Denver on the spot.

January 19, Thursday: No pain killers today. I went to work to tie up some loose ends before taking the next week off, and to had over a couple projects to Eric, the other Account Executive at work. While I was there,  he came to me and offered a blessing. I was so grateful! He pulled in the new guy, Brian, and they gave me a very sweet blessing. I felt worries leave me. I'm so grateful for worthy priesthood holders around me. Again, there was no trepidation at all. Only peace. And a kind of detached interest in what was happening. Dad, while grateful that Kelley would be with me, decided that he wanted a family member there to "make certain decisions in case they needed to be made." So he called his little sister, Aunt Jeri, to see if she could come, too. She could!! We all waited the whole day to see when we had to check in, and finally, a bit after 6pm, someone called me and told me to be at the hospital by 6:00am. Poor Aunt Jeri would be leaving her house around 4 to be there! Anyway, I quit taking the painkillers so that I'd be able to go pick up Kelley from the Provo airport. She arrived about 8 I think... I drove her around for a bit, showing her where I'd lived over the summer, etc. She was immediately fun to be around again. She is very good at laughing at my sense of humor. It's taken some work, but I'm glad our friendship survived living together. Sometimes it's hard to remember why you're friends with a person, but she came and reminded me.

January 20, Friday.  Kelley woke me up in time for a shower- my instructions were to get there fresh and clean- and we headed to Timpanogos Hospital. Aunt Jeri was there waiting, but when we went to check in, guess what: I wasn't on the schedule. The receptionist got on the phone to find out what was going on, but when it became clear that she wasn't getting anywhere, I called the number on my phone from the night before, when that guy called to tell me to be "at the hospital" at 6. I was transferred several times before I found someone who explained that I was to be all the way down at the PROVO hospital, and to get there as fast as I could. I was worried that I might lose my slot, so we got in the car and drove to the hospital. Aunt Jeri managed to find the right entrance, but Kelley and I, following signs for surgery, found an entirely different entrance. Once again, we were in the wrong place, and told to go to the other side of the building. Aunt Jeri was there working on paperwork when I walked in. They took me directly to the back, where they drew more blood and made me pee in a cup. (It was bright red. They didn't say anything about it, but I'm going to ask the surgeon about it.) They weighed me ( another couple lbs lost!) and took me to the pre-op room where I changed into a gown that had a hook up to a machine that would heat or cool the gown! A gown with built-in air-conditioning! yeeeah! I cranked up the cooler. I'd been running around all morning, after all, I was hot! The annoying nurse with rehearsed fake friendliness and quips delivered by rote put in an IV and strapped interesting little thingies to my calves that would help discourage blood clots. The anesthesiologist came in and explained that he might break my teeth when he put in or took out the breathing tube, and asked me to sign a paper saying that I understood. Then Dr. Gil came in to say hello and explained to Aunt Jeri and Kelley that he'd be out right away to tell them how it went. Then the OR nurse came in to get me. I left my glasses with Kelley, so I didn't get to see much of the OR room. I scooted onto the operating table, and it seemed like everyone started doing stuff at once. A couple people at my legs, one on each arm, and the anesthesiologist at my head. I only had time to think that he was pressing a mask on my face with too much muscle, and I was out.  Soon I was slightly aware of being wheeled back into the waiting room where Kelley and Aunt Jeri were. I slowly woke up and started interacting with them by means of asking for water every few minutes. dry dry dry mouth again. blech. I was breathing shallowly, so they hooked me up with an oxygen tube thing, but never turned it on. Oh brother.  Eventually I was sitting up and  got to eat some delicious chocolate pudding. I drank more water while going through two IV bags of fluid. Apparently I asked a few times about what Dr. Gil said...I kept forgetting what Aunt Jeri told me, but I'm afraid I still don't remember. I guess it's normal to ask the same questions over and over while coming out of anesthesia. About 3 pm, an itty-bitty nurse named Jane, who I liked immensely, came to take me to the bathroom. After the fluid and all that water, I really did have to go, but I was surprised at how long it took to persuade my body to let it go. Jane had to check on me while I sat on the throne. After a couple minutes more, I was able to completely relieve my bladder. When she heard the toilet flush, Jane came right in and asked to check my incisions. She held the gown completely to the side while she looked... okay... I was in a hospital, where my body was a public place for a little while... but, there was something in Jane's manner that made it all okay. We took the long way back to the little room, and I got the okay to change and get ready to go. She took out the IV needle, and wrapped it up. Kelley went to go get my car and Aunt Jeri waited outside the curtain. I managed to get my underwear and pants to my knees, intending to pull them up after I got the gown off, but somehow the bandage came off and I was bleeding. I only managed to say "uh..." and Aunt Jeri instantly knew to come in. She wrapped me back up, and I finished changing. I got a wheelchair ride to the car, getting another cup of water on the way. I said goodbye to Aunt Jeri, kind of reluctantly, and Kelley and I went to Walmart to fill prescription for percocet and get a laxative at Dr. Gil's instruction. I climbed into a wheelchair and ceased to think about anything.  Kelley took care of it all. I did choose what kind of yogurt I wanted to eat over the next few days, but otherwise, she really did handle everything.  We finished shopping a bit before the prescription was ready, so she made me walk around a little, and then I was done, done, done. She drove us home, and I went to bed, while she did some work on the computer.

Over the next couple days, Kelley continued to take excellent care of me. She brought me my medicine, made me walk around, made me do my breathing exercising. She cooked, she kept the movies rolling, she talked me down from imminent fits of crying. She left Monday morning, and it was hard to face the time without her.

I got through the week somehow. I slept sitting up on the couch until Friday, when I found that I could lay on my side again. Natalie and her girls came to spend Wednesday with me. Natalie did my laundry and washed my sheets. What wonderful service she did!!  I loved hanging out with them here. They came back on Sunday, with Mo, and we had Sunday dinner together. Nat left me some leftovers and milk, which has lasted me all week. The Relief Society has also been wonderful in bringing me dinners every night. My visiting teacher thoughtfully brought me a stack of DVD's to watch. I spent $6.00 and got a computer game off steam.com which helped to pass the hours.

I did not like spending so much time alone and in the same room, and the pain kind of took over from time to time.  I also ran out of my happy pill, so depression symptoms came crowding in, bearing claws and teeth. Thank goodness for loving parents who took the time to talk to me, even in the middle of the night once. Also thank goodness for siblings who called to check on me, too. I was by myself, but not alone.

Tomorrow morning is exactly two weeks after the surgery, and I'll be back at work. I've gone in for half days, but I'm going to try to get a whole day in tomorrow.

I feel better. I'm a bit sore. Each incision stings, and I can't really breathe a full breath, yet, but I'm finally sleeping deeply enough to really rest, which makes the biggest difference.

I have a follow-up appointment with Dr. Gil on Monday, February 6.

The Gory Pictures:


Shall we start with the worst? Here is my removed gallbladder:

Gross, isn't it?  The gallstones are quite large compared to other pictures I've found online, but what is more interesting, I haven't seen pictures of other removed gallbladders that look so puffy. Dr. Gil said the gallbladder walls were FOUR times as thick as normal. From what I've read about it, The walls are thick from the infection, and from working so hard to do it's job around the gallstones. Here is a look at what seems to be typical of a removed gallbladder with stones:

(http://www.sciencephoto.com/media/257120/enlarge)

Now for something nicer: my sweet face!

Here I am shortly after waking up from anesthesia in the recovery room. I've got an ice pack on the incision at my belly-button... I didn't even know it until I got up. There are four incisions, one at the top of my belly, one at my belly-button, two on my right side. This is what they look like:

This is the incision (the smallest) at the top of my belly a couple days after surgery. There are no stitches, just surgical glue holding them together. The area covered by the glue above is a little bigger than a quarter. The glue just now starting to peel off my skin, the incisions clean and healing nicely. My scars will be pretty thin.

This is the breathing exercise thingy they sent me home with. I place the mouthpiece in my mouth and breathe in, trying to keep the yellow lever on the left in the "best" area, while pulling the white lever as high as I can get it. Let me tell you, it is HARD. Okay, it's easy, but right after surgery, I could hardly lift the white lever to 1500. It took real effort, and Kelley made me do it 5 times in a row every couple hours. Ugh! Here I am reluctantly giving it a go later the day of surgery.

More ice packs and pillows all around me on our soft couch got me through. I whined every time Kelley said it was time to breathe, but she only laughed at me.  I still can't inhale all the way without sharp pain on my right side, but I guess that's normal.  We'll see what Dr. Gil says on Monday during my follow up.

The Medical Stuff:

As I understand it: The gallbladder stores bile created by the liver which is used to break down fats. Gallstones are formed from an accretion of bile components... I can't find a really good explanation- apparently the bile can harden, and form a stone.

Here is a video explanation of the surgery I found on YouTube: 

There are only a couple differences. In my case, I was not given a sedative or pain medication just prior to surgery. No need. I was utterly calm. I'd had a blessing, I trusted Dr. Gil, I'd prayed that morning and felt perfectly safe.  Also, they did NOT drain all the carbon dioxide. I had to burp it out. It also rose up into my shoulders, which was painful. There were no bandages, just the glue.

And here is an actual gallbladder removal, if you're interested. Watch the above video first so you know what is going on:

There you have it. Everything I can think of to describe my gallbladder experience.  An eventful January. I wonder what February will bring.